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The Youthful Cougar Next Door ★ Movie Collection 700+ ★ "FB de jour: "What a woman. Pretty much the only reason I'm on adultwork. Best role play ever." - Mattindro

Gender Female
Age 52
Orientation Bi-sexual
Country United Kingdom
Region London
Town London
Nationality British
Postcode N3

⚠️ To expedite an efficient arrangement, please supply these ABSOLUTE BASICS ⚠️ to avoid being disregarded as a time wasting numpty ⚠️ No deposit = no booking

** EMAIL only ** please include IN ONE MESSAGE Only if you would like a response of course

DATE & TIME: YOUR window of AVAILABILITY? eg: within what time frame you are free to play eg 2pm to 5pm i work afternoons as a preference but with enough notice morning booking may be possible. I do not work after 6pm
LOCATION: < your home or your hotel? It will be necessary to book a hotel if you can not host
DURATION: < an hour is generally the minimum you can BOOK; max is 2 hours for initial meet It may be possible to extend further
SERVICES: < This is the activities you have on your To Do list eg: WS, CIM, etc One must never assume the activity you're looking for is on the cards!
DEPOSIT First hour is required in full in advance at time of booking

I do not take bookings using the impersonal, presumptuous online booking system because you're not ordering a fucking pizza. Whenever I get those ridiculous things I can instantly see those who have not read the profile. Just like those who make contact without providing the basic information requested. Such a shame to stumble at the first hurdle but take solace you're in the company of the 99.99% dejected majority.


March 2020: "Ahhhh, the one and only KDB. A sapiosexual's dream. Wit, intelligence and filth all wrapped up in a ravishingly delectable package. Sublime!"

After being on AW since the very beginning 20 years ago, my content is not only evolved in quality and quantity, but visually describes my journey through various sexual and personal adventures with folk who have come and gone.

Recently only filming in full HD and where possible, multiple cameras, professional lighting & external audio.

I am always filming with new folk, both experienced pros like myself and newbies.

The Paperwork

• 3 consecutive months of clean sexual health certs are required for unprotected
• Model Release forms will be exchanged together with government ID
• Payment in full in advance as with any other face to face meet

Guys: Training Available

You will need to be an established creator in top single digit % like me on OF to qualify for a direct content share otherwise it's obviously NOT a Collab.

If not, I can give you all the training and information you need to get started as a successful adult content creator. With over 20 years experience on both sides of the DSLR, you will access training on:

Etiquette: Collabs & Testing
Equipment: Camera, Lighting, Rigging
Sites: Fan & Clip
Editing: Workflow & Software (video, photo, audio)
Positions: Do's & Don'ts

As well as walking away with one or two full scenes depending on how many hours you have booked.


Recommended is booking 2 hours and most likely get 2 full scenes
If you book only 1 hour you will miss out on a lot of advice and information and there will barely be sufficient time to shoot 1 very short scene

Quality shoots take time to set up, prep for and tear down. Lights need to be assembled, cameras need to be set, we need to be squeaky clean and that's before the actual filming. Assuming we work in silence. Which we don't.

Adultwork Site Gaslighting Glitch

In June 2023 the site started gaslighting by way of rejecting all my content, simply stating that it does not play which of course it does. Very successfully. On each and every one of my fan and clip sites of which i hold a long established profile on several.

These sites are where my new content is now successfully and efficiently uploaded each and every single fucking day without issue.

⭐️ Star of Channel 4: "Phone Sex Secrets" ☎️ We can speak on the phone or use your favourite messaging app/platform

Welcome to the louche world of my popular Fantasy phone sex sessions as I expertly extract the very seed from your already aching balls with my impeccable, honeyed dulcet purr, lavishing your libido with salacious sensuality.

Free MP3 with every Direct Chat call over 10 mins

I realise that your twitching cock is already fit to blow when you call, so my mission:
To string your call out as long as possible get you off as quickly as possible I take great pride at getting straight down to business & my mission (unless you request otherwise) is to deseed your ballsack AS QUICKLY AS POSSIBLE!

☎️ FREE MP3 with every phone chat BOOKING • Listen to our Phone Chat Session on any device

If you would like to listen to my dulcet tones again & again all you need to do is make a PHONE CHAT BOOKING & mention MP3 in comments & I will record it for you to be sent to you within minutes of the end of the call Check out my Feedback & book with confidence.

☎️ SILENT CALLS ☎️ Participation Optional ☎️ BOOKING ONLY ❌ NOT AVAILABLE on DIRECTCHAT ❌ include details with your booking

As a veteran Phone Sex Chat Performer your participation/encouragement is entirely optional and with little guidance I can easily amuse, excite and despunk those tight balls without any of the awkward silences offered by less accomplished counterparts.

I am an experienced professional Voice Over actress and DCH, DHP Masters qualified Clinical Hypnotherapist and Psychotherapist, unsurprisingly, with a particular interest in Psychosexual Therapy and as such you will find that I am extremely versatile, lending an empathic & understanding ear to both fantasy and personal topics alike.

Scripted MP3 Recordings £5/min

If you would like me to record your script simply send it to me and I will record, edit and encode it at studio standard with my professional expertise.

Why don't you listen to my pre recorded erotica previous SILENT CALLS in the EROTICA section to hear the professional quality

☎️ To make a call on DIRECTCHAT you will need sufficient credits to conduct a 5 minute call

If you are not able to get through on DirectChat please make a Phone Chat Booking as or try again a little later. It will just be that my phone is very busy and some persistence is required! You do not need to withhold your details as all I see on my end is the AdultWork Phone Chat number

☎️ IGNORE ☎️ Participation Optional ☎️ DIRECT CHAT

Those who like me, love to engage in this particular fetish, will simply stay quiet on their Direct Chat call and not say a peep. The phone will then be switched to loudspeaker while you listen to me continuing about my life completely oblivious to your existence.

If you would like me to call you or have any other Special Requests please let me know in the comments box of your Phone Chat Booking Request

❌ NO NO NO! ❌

In accordance with AW rules, please note that I do not engage in illegal activities including inc*st, children, animals and r*pe. Should you direct the conversation in this direction you will be permanently blocked at the end of the short & rather awkward call.

☎️ DIRECTIM ☎️ DirectCam Platform ☎️ TYPED CHAT

FB 10/03/23: "Amica KDB is beautiful, highly intelligent and lots of filthy fun! Her phone chat is the best out there. She's a pro and she loves it. Highly recommended.." - David Lloyd


Within seconds of entering my professional, top notch virtual room you will both hear and see see that you are dealing with no ordinary cam performer, but a consummate professional with an obsessive attention to technical as well as sexual detail.

★ Follow My Socials: AmicaBentleyOF and derivatives thereof ★

Free Movie for every show > 10 mins < Email directly after show <

DirectCam for you to catch one of my sensual shows when you can! CUM & see what you should expect from mature porn star Amica Bentley! Unsurprisingly, the first Webcam Performer of the Year Winner putting those 30 years in the industry to good use!

8 Jan 23: "What a woman, what a show! Absolute perfection!" - Giblet72

4K DSLR Video Stream courtesy of Top Notch Lens on both DSLRs ♥️ Professional external AUDIO

• GROUP: POV • Body Worship • Spitting • Dirty Talk > I will cavort, tease & pose to my heart's content as you quietly enjoy the view where in this mode it is mine to control; as with our escort encounter, there will be no rush. Requests are most welcome in the exclusive setting as detailed below:

• PRIVATE: As above PLUS: Requests, phone • watersports • domination • JOI • Guided Masturbation • foot worship • verbal humiliation • farting • fetishes & roleplays > my undivided personal attention • Specific requests • undivided attention to your c2c • Escort Availability & booking enquiries

Treat yourself to an unrivalled experience with no detail spared in this high calibre juxtaposition of high grade equipment to upgrade your floppy disc to a hard drive and understand why I was the very first WEBCAM PERFORMER OF THE YEAR

30 Dec 2022: "Best experience ever highly recommend her" - BrownCockWanker

DirectIM works on the same platform as DirectCAM so it will look exactly the same except for the first time you will see the typed filth that spills from my lightning quick fingers instead of my succulent mouth

An ex Legal Secretary (notorious in the typing world for our superlative speeds) my lightning quick fingers swiftly dance over the keyboard, relaying over 80 words per minute of fucked up fun for your visual enjoyment

Whether you are looking for advice or Sexting, THIS is the place to come!

FB 25/06/19: "Sexy sexy sexy!!! I love wanking with this goddess!" - WhoAteAllThePussies

More Than Sex Chat

Whether you are seeking advice and assistance of a sexual, dietary, pick my personal trainer brain, professional or technical nature I can provide this service by way of DirectChat or DirectIM


FB 23/10/19: "Incredible hour with this sexy pocket rocket. She's a stunner, all the right levels of dirty mixed with sexy. Best meeting I've ever had!" - Naughty_Hobby

All natural: no fake: nails, hair, tan, botox, fillers, tits or even dyed hair; WYSIWYG. The exact same size in my 50's as I was in my teens: a petite, perfectly proportioned size 10. With a biological age of 30, not only do I look good for MY age, but give those half my age a run for their pocket money!

I have been on Adultwork from the very beginning although not on this profile, obviously. This is my second profile after I gave it all up for my crush who promised the earth but it wasn’t to be.

The Packaging

I love dressing to impress especially if that means my favourite; no dress whatsoever! Here are a few suggestions and feel free to add your own to this customer led list:

• Sexy Secretary
• Slinky evening gown
• Exquisite designer lingerie
• Latex/Leather/PVC clad vixen complete with extreme fetish boots
• Normal Old Girl Next door Clothing
• Cutesy Coquette

Allow not the mouth watering scale of my experience in entertaining high octane shenanigans blind you to the fact that I am feminine, demure & petite, with a particularly fertile imagination. Do understand the more extreme activities are available only to those who request such a service so get a rein on any skewed projections that you won't be able to satisfy me, or be 'enough' as delicate snowflakes have countered in the past.
13 Oct 2019: "Incredible hour with this sexy pocket rocket. She's a stunner, all the right levels of dirty mixed with sexy. Best meeting I've ever had" - toptony1

You will enjoy a sensual and attentive lover, who after a few decades of adult entertainment, reflexively empathic and conversant in more ways than one's less chronologically accomplished counterparts.

Downright depraved professional published mainstream & adult model AdultWork Webcam Performer of the Year 2015 & Shafta Nominated Milf of the Year. Despite my exotic appearance, all natural mane of dark glossy hair & sparkling blue eyes I am BRITISH born, bred & softly spoken. Mostly!


All the while working both as a professional mainstream model, pole dancer & Air Hostess, I followed my smouldering passion for sexual adventure which lured me from being a Fetish Model & Professional Dominatrix. After honing the fine art of FemDom for a decade and appearing in countless fetish movies, I then got rid of the ridiculous fake tits and briefly dipped my toe into mainstream porn, electing to work for only the very best in the business for the brief time indulged:

Killergram • Kaizen • Playboy • Television X • Red Hot TV • Daring • PureXXX • Kendo • Private • Jim Slip • Dorcel • Philipe Soine • Magma • Woman Worship • The English Mansion: • The Adult Channel • Porn XN • Red Hot • AllMums • Fake Taxi - UKAP Best Site 2014 • Fake Agent

• Cock & Cash
• Best of British & Extreme Voyeur Sex
• Milf Mayhem
• British Porn Queens
• A Milf Teen Corruption
• Extreme Voyeur Sex
• Spyfall
• Cock & Cash
• GloryHole Virgin
• Strapon GangBang
• Lustful Housewives
• Couples Seeking Teens
• How To Train Your Wife
• Step-Mums In Charge
• iconfessfiles
• Stocking Tops
• Real Life Stories
• Versklavt
• La Baise les petites Anglaises
• The Book Club
• Real F*sting Babes


This profile and its material is © of AmicaBentley • All Rights Reserved • Any redistribution, reproduction in part or all contents in any form is prohibited. You may not redistribute any of my unique content. Nor may you transmit it or store it in any other website or other form of electronic retrieval system. v2


  • Voyeurism
  • Uniforms
  • Fetish
  • Massage
  • Being Filmed
  • Domination (giving)
  • Striptease
  • Foot Worship
  • Modeling
  • Pole Dancing
  • Tie & Tease
  • Lapdancing
  • Sybian & Machine Sex
  • Disabled Clients
  • Hand Relief
  • Silent Caller (Phone Chat)

I meet with

  • Male
  • Female
  • Couple MF

Incall rates

Duration Cost
1 Hour £500

Outcall rates

Duration Cost
1 Hour £500


Q : Will you call me?

A : Neither by request or otherwise will I ever call you.

Q : No Reply?

A : To avoid insulting your intelligence with a duplicate answer already provided, the information already provided will not be regurgitated upon request, especially if a hastily penned impersonal note is the best you can manage. Disregarding the ignorant who feel they are above such minutiae I have found is an efficient way at weeding out those adamantly refuse to review the information already provided for everyone's convenience. I am notoriously selective with whom I spend my time and so should you.

Q : Domme or Sub?

A : I can provide Soft/Sensual/Gentle domination and in the right company, mild submissive play. Please ask for additional rates for the latter.

Q : Do you REALLY do everything on your likes list?

A : The whole point of going into so much detail both LIKES & DISLIKES is to assure you of the veracity of my advertising. Those asking this have clearly failed to avail themselves of the prolific information provided and so are disregarded as a potential plaything.

Q : Can I send you a photo?

A : No. This isn’t Tinder. Your looks are immaterial.

Q : Bookings 2hrs+

A : First meeting preference generally up to a couple of hours although it may be possible to extend once we have established compatibility.


A : Whilst I can, do and have worked with similar high calibre individuals, they will need to be approached and booked separately.


A : I cater for most fetishes and am well versed in some niche activities including but not limited to: Ball busting | Cock Bondage | Foot fetish | Role-play | Sensual domination | spitting | unwashed/sweaty | watersports


A : Required at time of booking regardless of your feedback status. Various options available; no credit cards or paypal. More of a payment in full, in advance really. Those special snowflakes that feel that the deposit applies to everyone but them will be sorely disappointed.

Q : you avail today?

A : Possibly. Whilst I am potentially available every single day, escorting is a very occasional part time job around which my life does not revolve

Q : Domination:

A : My domination style is akin to a playful, sensual kinky girlfriend with a penchant to using boys for sex and money. Lighthearted playful sessions with Me taking the lead well within our respective boundaries. Pain & humiliation/degradation (mild at that) is only available upon request. Extreme, shouty violent, noisy, extreme or misandrist, not so much.


A : Schlepping to some far flung location to claw back the funds necessary to offset the stupidity of leaving my cosy home is the utter definition of insanity.

Q : "I have a flat to rent"

A : Inevitably these brothels are grim AF which is presumably why they have taken to spamming their putrid little hovel.


A : Attempting to acquire a lower rate to the one you are quoted is a form of haggling and will not be tolerated. Bitching about my long standing rates which have hovered in much the same place for the last couple of decades is obtuse & ineffective.

Q : How many times can I cum?

A : You will have to reconcile your optimism with your physical capacity. Are you looking for an enjoyable, natural experience or a mechanical spunk extraction regime? You may wish to extend the booking at a pro rated fee, especially if you fail to despunk for the umpteenth time within the duration booked.

Q : There is too much to read!

A : Maybe addressing your crippling ADD might be more pressing than researching which prostitute upon which to fritter your hard earned cash.


A : This list is not exhaustive and updated regularly (Jan 2022) Anal | bareback | deepthroat | dirty bum service | drugs | Evening Bookings | Face Fucking | fisting (receiving) | forced intox (any) | free advice/chat | Gangbangs | Hagglers | hair pulling | hardsports | honeytrap | incest chat or RP | lift & carry | multiple bookings per day | name writing | 'party' | Paypal | anything remotely paedophilic including schoolgirl uniform | restraint (me) | service trade | scissoring | smoking | splosh | Squirting | sugaring | pain (receiving) | pain; giving without prior consent | telepathy | touring | Vomit/Roman showers I will not be engaging with those who are delusional to think these activities are open to negotiation. They most certainly are not. Go push someone else's boundaries.

Q : What happens if our phone chat booking does not take place?

A : In accordance with AW rules put in place for your security and peace of mind, you will of course be refunded since no show took place. You can disregard any small print in any profile contradicting this official stand and AW will have your back when you initiate a refund which should be processed in a timely manner. You can book with confidence in line with AW strict T&C's which are on the side of the service seeker in this respect.


A : For my own peace of mind/sanity/security MMF bookings are only available to previous, clients one of whom I have met previously.


A : Enquire at time of booking. Content filmed on my camera and full model release required. See my movies section for previous real time punter sessions. All intellectual property rights reserved. Filming on your camera will be double the hourly rate.

Q : Outfits

A : • LINGERIE: Basque, suspenders, bra sets, panties sets, thong sets • LEATHER: Dress, Bra • Mini skirt • trousers • long gloves • booty shorts • LATEX: stockings, opera gloves, dress, thong, gauntlets • PVC: skirt, thong, short gloves, gauntlets, corset, halter bra top. • SPANDEX: Hood, Seamed Stockings • BOOTS: Ankle, knee, thigh length • STOCKINGS & SUSPENDERS: Fully Fashioned, Seamed, sheer, fishnet, red, white, black, flesh • holdups • SATIN: full back & french panties, negligee, gloves • GLOVES (satin): Black • Red • Silver • PANTIES (full back): white, black, red + others • THONGS & G STRINGS: white, black, red + others • UNIFORMS: Secretary/teacher/business woman • French Maid • authentic Air Hostess uniform misappropriated from previous employment I have most things, so if you have something in mind, and can't see it in the PRIVATE GALLERY by all means bring it along with you (size: Small • UK 8 • US Zero)

Q : I'm a VIRGIN/TEENAGER/REALLY FUCKING OLD/INEXPERIENCED/MARRIED/RELATIONSHIP/FIRST TIMER/MODEL/DISABLED/can't cum, Brad Pitt/phototrapher, [insert similar inconsequential detail such as ethnicity or religion here] etc - is that a problem?

A : I entertain all the delicious variations of respectful clean individuals regardless of age, gender, creed, colour, size (no its not too big; yes I've had bigger), shape or level of chronological advancement or even the lack thereof. Appearance is of absolutely zero relevance or even interest. The clients who pass my screening are respectful, clean and punctual. None of whom have thrust a photo into my inbox.

Q : Is this you? (photos/phone)

A : My lovingly crafted profile has taken nearly 2 decades to get to where it is today: • 3 recent profile photos watermarked Exclusive to Adultwork, for security they only appear HERE • A brief FREE introduction movie showing ME in ACTION! • Over 8,000 private photos • over 100 FREE pictures in my FREE gallery You can also avail yourself of over SIX THOUSAND feedbacks on there from 10 years of existence in only THIS incarnation of my profile; I have actually been on adult work since it started well over 10 years ago and am one of the original members, The Adultwork Performer of the Year and Adultwork Model Search Winner. That’s just on here. I have been cavorting on t’interwebs since they were invented in 2000

Q : TOYS • There is little I do not have. In the unlikely event it does not feature on this illustratory list please let me know

A : • Anal & Vaginal Dilators • Ball Gag: Solid & Breathe Through • Blind Folds • Bondage Straps • Butt Plugs: Small diamond, bunny tail • Dildoes: With & Without Harnesses • All shapes & sizes from "is it in yet" to "fuck off away from me with that you psycho" • Enema kit • Fucking Machine • Magic Wand • Nipple Clamps: Gentle, Clover Leaf • Percussive Implements: Paddle • Rubber Flogger • Restraints: Rope, cuffs, thigh bondage straps • Medical Play: Anal Dilator, Speculum, Gloves, Catheter Syringe • Strapon • wartenberg wheel • Wrist Restraints

Q : Tech Specs:

A : All of this would be NOTHING without the new and improved dedicated CAM beast: 3rd Gen AMD Ryzen 9 which necessitates top notch counterparts to avoid literal meltdown including but not limited to: • Kraken Z73, stuffed into the MEG AMD X570 ACE, powered by the meaty Corsair RM850x. It would be rude not to include the Geforce RTX 3080Ti Gaming Trio to do this delicious combo the justice you, I and it deserves. • VIDEO CAMERA: Manually adjusted DSLR for the superlative viewing experience in 4K courtesy of a cosy 30mm lens • LIGHTING: Several professional multi directional panels of manually adjusted diffusion for an optimal experience • INTERNET: Blisteringly fast, totally dedicated FIBRE OPTIC • The EDITING fiend: 4Ghz quad core i7 BOOSTED TO 4.2GHZ dripping in 32GB of 1867Mhz DDR3 SDRAM to support the AMD Radeon R9 M395X with 4GB video memory to complement the 5K retina 5120x2880 P3. • No shitty laptop with 99% CPU here, this superlative set up never needs to bother itself beyond 1% despite being simultaneously splattered over a multitude of sites. • AUDIO: none of this archaic inbuilt whoreshit; only an external professional standard microphone could possibly be utilised to enjoy my honeyed dulcet tones & sloppy wet slit in high sampling rate stereo, tweaked and optimised for a superior experience

Q : Porn stars/wannabe male escort/filming/camming/'house slaves'/profile tweakage/diet/photos/movies/health/problems/give me some advice/information/your opinion?

A : Whatever YOUR role, MY time is ALWAYS chargeable. Dream the fuck on; this is a business not a charity. Genuine clients seeking the benefit of my illustrious career will contact me on DirectChat & DirectCam like good boys & girls.

Q : The Numerous Copy & Paste Princesses: "I just LOVE your profile so just nicking this bit here"

A : Firstly, good luck with trying to keep up with my Profile OCD; I update mine on an embarrassingly frequent basis; add me to your hotlist and see what I mean! Those lacking in the intelligence, creativity & imagination required to create & maintain a profile of this calibre should copy at their peril & prepare for deletion. My personal answers are as distinctive as I. When my intellectual property is stolen the genuine answers I have provided will be incongruent with the rest of your evidently substandard profile.

Q : Do you have a members' site not listed here?

A : Several. But there are various tatty looking sites out there using my notoriety which are FAKE and nothing to do with me whatsoever. Any other sites that claim to be me, run by me or feature me are nothing to do with me. My fan sites are linked from the Twatter linked from my page here. By all means drop me a message to enquire if it’s me or not. Beware of cybersquatters attempting to cash in on my long established notoriety by ripping my stolen content onto their shitty sites.


Q : What is your starsign?

A : Libra Sept 23 - Oct 23

Q : What is your Primary Language?

A : Filth

Q : What is your Secondary Language?

A : Bollocks

Q : How would you describe your non-binary gender?

A : NA

Q : If other, please specify:

A : Get a fucking grip. You're either Male or Female

Q : What is your favourite colour?

A : Pussy Pink

Q : Who is your favourite celebrity?

A : The King of Carnivore: Shawn Baker

Q : What is your best feature?

A : Smile

Q : What is your worst feature?

A : Feet

Q : What three words best describe your personality?

A : Tenacious, Salubrious, Principled

Q : What is your favourite food?

A : Pasture Raised Organic ruminants

Q : What is your favourite drink?

A : Spunk

Q : What is your favourite film?

A : Running on Fat & The Magic Pill

Q : What is your favourite TV programme?

A : Fuck That Satanic Scrying Mirror Bull Shit

Q : What are your favourite flowers?

A : Money Trees otherwise please dont; SO indiscreet!

Q : What is your favourite perfume?

A : Tom Ford Vanille Tabac

Q : What is your favourite gift?

A : Cash

Q : What is your favourite holiday destination?

A : ANYWHERE really fucking SUNNY!

Q : What is your ethnicity?

A : Caucasian (White)

Q : What is the colour of your eyes?

A : Blue

Q : What is the colour of your hair?

A : Brown

Q : What length is your hair?

A : Long

Q : How would you describe your body type?

A : Small

Q : How tall are you?

A : 5'0

Q : How much do you weigh?

A : 8st

Q : What is your leg measurement?

A : 27"

Q : What is your shoe size?

A : 4

Q : What is your dress size?

A : 10

Q : What size is your chest?

A : 32"

Q : What is your waist measurement?

A : 26"

Q : What is your hips measurement?

A : 34"

Q : What is your bra cup-size?

A : C

Q : How would you describe the size of your breasts?

A : Small

Q : Are your breasts natural or enhanced?

A : Natural

Q : How is your pubic hair fashioned?

A : Natural

Q : Do you smoke?

A : Socially

Q : Do you have any tattoos or piercings?

A : Neither

Q : If you have tattoos or piercings, how discreet are they

A : None

Q : Do you have any birth-marks or scars? If so, size and location?

A : Why?

Q : What times are you always available?

A : Week day Afternoons

Q : Will you do overnight bookings?

A : No

Q : List of Towns/Areas you will visit

A : London

Q : How long are you prepared to travel for?

A : 1hr

Q : Nearest rail station?

A : South Kensington

Q : What is the most embarrassing thing that has ever happened to you in public?

A : Morons bawling my working name across the street whilst I was out with family.

Q : What sort of men turn you on?

A : Clean, polite, gentlemen who can follow basic instructions provided in the informative profile.

Q : What sort of women turn you on?

A : The thoughtful females who alert me of clueless bitches copying my intellectual property.

Q : What is the most memorable sexual experience you’ve ever had?

A : See movies

Q : What is the most outrageous thing that you’ve done sexually (be honest!)

A : Me? Outrageous? I'm just a little old lady catering to the predilections of a Profoundly damaged society working through their trauma in a sexual context.

Q : Where would you most like to have sex?

A : Tartaria checking out all the antiquitech on a fist full of red pills.

Q : What is your favourite sexual position?

A : Using males for money

Q : What is your second favourite sexual position?

A : Using males for amusement

Q : What is your biggest turn on?

A : Being paid to receive pleasure whilst dreaming about my next perfect rib eye steak dripping in pasture raised butter & fresh marrow

Q : The most sensitive part of my anatomy is?

A : Brain

Q : Describe the experience (when and where)

A : The Free Wank Fodder Department is closed

Q : What is your favourite sexual fantasy?

A : A clean client reading the profile before making contact as requested including all the information, paying his deposit within minutes, turning up on time and fucking off without overstaying his welcome.

Q : How often do you masturbate?

A : Demand and remuneration driven

Q : What sexual activity do you enjoy the most?

A : Being the recipient of an expert oily massage

Q : When is your libido at its highest?

A : During remuneration

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